I have the 10th Anniversary edition of this horrible cookbook called The New INTER COURSES. The book is broken down into the aphrodisiacs of the world like chocolate, chilies, and asparagus, and then suggests recipes based on these foods. How anyone could possibly drink a whole cup of syrupy, Mexican hot chocolate and then want to have sex is beyond me. Unless your idea of sex is lying still and digesting.

I cannot deny that when I put real, dark chocolate in my mouth I am almost instantly aroused. Even thinking about putting chocolate in my mouth right now makes me want to have sex. But I would be basically comatose after partaking in a meal consisting of Come-to-Jamaica Wings followed by Pasta with Asparagus, Chicken, and Gorgonzola, and finished with a nice thick slice of Black Russian Cake.

Hopefully your significant other can handle the arousal part with their tongue or flashing some bare part of their anatomy that gets you going (unless, of course, you are dead inside). However, my new enjoyment is post-coital fruit. Now I know fruit after sex is a known thing, but OMFG it cannot possibly be fully appreciated.

There is almost nothing I have found that parallels the food experience of hopping off your partner, still dripping in sweat, and going to the fridge to pull out the cold and supple mango you’ve been waiting to ripen. With your nail, you pierce the skin, rip some of it off with your teeth, and bite into the impossibly juicy and slippery flesh. And then do it again and again and again. Then eventually you find your partner and share it with them. It is a fight to the finish, which involves scraping your teeth across the pit or sticking the whole thing in your mouth. Forget arousal, it’s all about the rejuvenation.

(I couldn’t find anything substantial to account for my carnal response to mangoes after sex, but I can say it’s a good source of Vitamin E. Also, I consider my body to be a pretty good judge of what it needs. I try and listen, sometimes denying the urge if I can stand it, but mostly I respond accordingly.)

Photo by Rahul Saghal.